Anxiété

I feel so dumb after my last post. I feel like protecting it or even erasing it. It’s a one-thousand-word whine about how embarrassed and humiliated I felt. Truth is I could’ve saved my readers from it, it was nothing more than a public display of what an anxiety disorder looks like. Well… when I put it that way I guess I can find some use for it and leave it there. I’ll change its name and it’ll stay put, maybe someday it can help someone.

Right now I feel much better, though it was a very tough morning, with whines on Facebook and Twitter included. There should be an emergency protocol for when my AD peaks, where I was banned from any form of internet ramblings. Anyhow, glad things are stabilizing a little. I’m not sure what it’ll be like tomorrow when I have to show my face in Mount Olympus though.

I wish I could go through these kinds of situations, like the one yesterday, like a normal person. I wish it didn’t affect me so hard. But I’ll stop whining about that too before I get sad again.

Thanks for your support, it helped me so much!

dumb

 

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18 thoughts on “Anxiété

  1. Sometimes I sit and think about every stupid thing I’ve ever done all at once, too. Usually when I’m trying to sleep. Good times.

    Don’t sweat it. We love you anyway. 🙂

  2. ah, dont put yourself down. you got triggered. you had a reaction. its over, and you know youre ok. and youre right, one day, youll be able to work on those triggers and change the reactions, maybe even like a ‘normal’ person—whatever that is!

  3. My friend told me that my blog, was my blog. What I put on there is up to me.

    Your blog isn’t for others, it’s for you. If you need to vent, meltdown, freak out, or whatever, then do it. Self doubt and anxiety go hand in hand. Don’t worry about what we think. I’ve had my own meltdowns and my time on here is much shorter then yours.

  4. it takes courage to share feelings the way that you have been doing on this blog. When you share your feelings, other people may have their feelings affirmed, or you may get the understanding and support that you need, or both. There is nothing wrong about that; and nothing to be embarrassed about. Hugs from Kim

  5. Chatte, I think you did exactly the right thing by posting. What you described is exactly what happens to so many of us because we have such a distorted view of ourselves based on not getting our needs met as children. But here’s the wonderful thing, when other people read your story, they can clearly see that you are over-reacting and being way too hard on yourself. That in reality it was a small mistake and one that anyone can make. So maybe the next time they are beating themselves up, they will remember reading this and pause to think that maybe they are being too hard on themselves and practice some self compassion. It is so much easier to see other people clearly because our own emotions about ourselves do not interfere. I want you to go back and read that post, but imagining that one of your friends had written it and see how it sounds then. That will bring you closer to the truth of the situation. You are human and that is a wonderful thing, What is even more wonderful is that you are courageous enough to share that humanity with us. Thank you. xx AG

    • Thank you AG! When I first read your comment it helped so much. Sorry I took so long to answer it though, I was still feeling triggered by the whole thing, now I’m feeling better about the whole thing and can look back at the experience as an opportunity I had to learn more from myself. Lots of hugs! xx

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