To write or not to write is not the question, but it’s been so hard these days because of all the factors that need to be in place at the same time: availability, not being beyond exhaustion, and the writer being actually awake. And today, in this glorious afternoon, this seems to be the case. After a year of constant, periodical blogging, I think it’s not completely out-of-place to call me a blogger. And yet, whenever I’ve expressed my mortification for not blogging as much as I’d like to, people look at me as if I were expressing a panic attack over not doing my nails or something. It’s this kind of thing that makes me remember how special this WP inner, almost secret world brings into my life. I’ve tried Blogspot and Tumblr, they didn’t even come close. I won’t go into details because I’ve read about 163 posts that revolve around this, and I think every wordpresser will know where the fails and wins are.
And that’s not to say WordPress is perfect, it’s actually far from it, but I am convinced it’s the best option out there right now, at least for what I do. See, I’m not only a blogger, I’m beginning to think of myself as a writer (NOT saying I think I’m a good one, mind you), and I don’t want this part of me to ever be taken away.
Anyhow, long story short, my life’s changing and I haven’t being able to record and describe it here, and that’s making me go crazy. I’m not even doing my side, hidden writing anymore, I just haven’t had the energy in quite a while. When the emergency battery starts being used, there unfortunately are systems that need to be shot down for the whole structure to not fall apart, and that’s the case with my fiction. I’m intending to change that. I’m running on that emergency battery no more. For me to be able to do that, I’ll have to change and sacrifice some things. I’m willing to. Not writing hurts me more than writing. Hurts me more than therapy, and hurts me more than not doing therapy.
So in that perspective, and considering my official workload has being very much reduced as vacations approach, I’ll be posting a lot more than what I have in the past months, there’s so much to tell that I shouldn’t have a problem as long as I stay driven and keep sleeping human hours.
I’m sorry if I haven’t responded to some of your previous comments, they’ve all been read and have been incredibly comforting, I’ll get to them too I promise!